August 11, 2017

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On August 5, 2017 I noticed a long black hair… on my toe! One lone hair. At first I thought it was some hair that fell on my toe, but when I pulled it… it was not coming off. I guess I’ll have hairy toes eventually too? It’s kind of funny and fascinating, in a way. Being so excited about a hair on my toe, I mean. Even if I am perfectly fine with having hairless feet, and would prefer it that way. But it’s still exciting, and I don’t actually mind it.

On August 9, 2017 my appetite seemed to be getting back. I was also not feeling as hot as before. I only wonder if this weird heatwave will repeat itself after my next shot. I guess I’ll wait and see.

I also realized how odd and awkward I often act around new people when there’s someone else with me who thinks I’m a girl. It’s like I am trying to avoid the pretty much inevitable exposure. It will only get trickier with time, I suppose. I just really can’t wait for the day where I will be in an environment where I won’t have to deal with such awkwardness and everyone will know me and accept me (and won’t trip on pronouns) as a guy.

On August 11, 2017 I was just contemplating on how I shouldn’t be afraid to make the next big steps in my life. I always have to consider certain factors, if I wish to switch jobs. And especially if I were to move to another country. Being transgender and on hormone replacement therapy (HRT) definitely makes life trickier. I have to anticipate certain things and what-not. Either way, there are things in my life I want and need to change to get to the next level. I need to be confident and trust in myself, and plan my next steps.

Because I can do better. I deserve better. I am better.

#JourneyToMyself

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